Day 2 Fall Tour 2016 September 8th
(Although it's still technically day 1 for me but we'll let that slide)
Got to Vancouver Airport and managed a short power meeting with my new administrative CEO. Actually, I headhunted her, she's got a nice head...she would have, she's my daughter. Whilst discussing high powered business stuff like my overuse of ellipses..... ....... ..... Apparently it wasn't actually Will and Kate's cavalcade but rather our very own Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's. Well The O'Briens aren't playing for him either, no matter how much we love him, and we do love him.
It gets to almost 30 minutes before boarding, and the line ups have already started. This causes me a huge amount of angst. Do they not know when they pay all that money that they are actually guaranteed a seat? It's not first come, first served people!
An announcement comes over the tannoy, asking if there any civic minded volunteers who would like to check in their hand luggage. I usually do this, it makes me feel like a good citizen and it means I'm not carrying two bags. I smugly walk up to the counter oozing the "I will make a sacrifice" vibe, and a very nice young lady thanks me sincerely, which was fine. I wasn't expecting a hug.
She turns away with my bag, and then she stops abruptly and turns round to me with a worried look on her face.. She said (and I jest ye not) "Have you got everything you need from this bag like your medications?" *very pregnant pause, 42 weeks at a guess* "Because once it's checked you can't get to it." Now I know I've had a busy summer and I wasn't looking particularly Brad Pitt, but what a bloody nerve! I honestly didn't know what to say. I was tempted to start shaking and do my dying fly impersonation (anyone remember TISWAS?) but I just looked sheepish and said I was fine as long as I could be guaranteed hard liquor for the entire flight.
This little exchange reminded me of a similar interchange I had two years ago at The Bay Centre in Victoria. I think I was buying my wife something, I usually do. Anyway, after searching for almost 6 hours for a checkout person, I found what appeared to be a lovely lady, and I'm going to be gracious and say in her late 60's. She ran the goods through and then looked at me with nary a smile or giggle and said "Seniors discount?"
I almost choked, I was 48 at the time. I said "Have they just lowered the age of retirement, or can you only get this job if your IQ is lower than the Canadian Dollar?"
She took this answer to mean no. She then went on to charge me the usual rate. You think after she had verbally violated me she might have said, "Oh Sir, please forgive my oversight, I'll give you the senior discount anyway and you can also get two for one on Loreal's ( because I'm worth it but old) piles cream!" But no. "Not even 10% off compression stockings?" I pleaded, "Or what about incontinence pads, any specials on those?"
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
Keep right on,